Life

I believe my life should be radiant, indestructible, and full of God’s glory.  I believe I should give myself away for one purpose—to love God and to serve His people.  The problem is there is a chasm between by belief system and my functional faith.    Analyzing, fretting, and worrying over uncontrollable things such as financial insecurities tend to exalt themselves in my mind’s eye.  My fleshly desire for a complacent life of comfort and ease tends to steal God's purpose and promises from me.  The anxious greed of, “I want something that I cannot have,” exalts its ugly head and worry begins to take over.  The lie of, “If I could work so many hours, I would have this much money,” continues to grow as I begin to serve it.  It soon takes on life of its own and I bow to this god of work, fret, and worry; for where my treasure is, my heart will be there also.

This morning as I was sitting outside, I noticed three rabbits playing in the open field.  These rabbits were carefree, hopping, resting, and eating out of my garden.  I thought about the topic of this blog and the freedom of those rabbits.  God is providing for them and He will continue providing for them their whole life.  God has an even bigger promise for me, to seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and He will provide for all my needs.  It comes down to an issue of trust.  Do I trust my God to provide for me as He does the wild animals of the world?  Am I willing to lay my comfortable life down for His purpose and will?  I must question, “Who am I living for, myself or my God?”  “He who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for My sake will find it. Matthew 10:39

Psalm 130 has helped me to quiet my heart and trust my God.  I have moved from asking Him to provide more money or hours, for that is a dead god to serve.  I am asking Him to invade my life, to forgive me of my selfishness, and to give me His heart and desires.  Oh, for His grace to live each day in His presence, with His provision, serving others as He leads. "I wait for the LORD, my soul does wait, and in His word do I hope.

Out of the depths I have cried to You, O LORD; 

 Lord, hear my voice  Let Your ears be attentive
         To the voice of my supplications.  If You, LORD, should mark iniquities,
         O Lord, who could stand?
   But there is forgiveness with You,
         That You may be feared.
          I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
         And in His word I do hope.
  My soul waits for the Lord
         More than those who watch for the morning—
         Yes, more than those who watch for the morning.
         O Israel, hope in the LORD;
         For with the LORD there is mercy,
         And with Him is abundant redemption.
  And He shall redeem Israel
         From all his iniquities